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Unhappy over divorce? Evidence to cheer you up

A recent article in the Huffington Post visits a dual-edged theme that is often mentioned in family law articles concerning marital dissolution, with its author noting that common perceptions are sometimes misplaced.

Alexandra Churchill notes the tendency of many persons to view divorce as a personal failure and an enduring marriage -- even a bad one -- as being the preferable alternative. Such persons often wallow in guilt and other negative emotions both during divorce proceedings and following dissolution, finding it a personal failure that they didn't manage to "stick it out."

A tandem concern -- an often deep-seated and enduring fear -- is that post-divorce life will promise little in the way of hope, happiness or financial security.

Although diminished expectations do in fact become realized for some divorcing parties in Colorado and nationally, they are by no means preordained, and Churchill's article hammers that point home in a most resolute and optimistic way.

It fact, it serves as a clarion call for many recently divorced people (Churchill's audience focus is primarily women) to, essentially, wake up and smell the roses.

Here's the bottom line, says Churchill: Life after divorce is often just as good as it was during marriage, and many times far better.

And that assessment, she notes, is confirmed through "study-backed facts that'll make you feel better about being newly single again."

One study she cites concluded that many women "feel much happier for up to five years" following a divorce, experiencing more elation over their changed status than what was found to be the case with men.

Findings from other studies also indicate that health can improve across a wide spectrum following cessation of "an unhappy, conflict-riddled marriage."

And optimism can certainly be gleaned from the findings of the group Marriage Foundation, which cites statistics showing a decreased divorce risk in second versus initial marriages.

Source: Huffington Post, "6 little-known benefits of being divorced," Alexandra Churchill, Oct. 26, 2013

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